Hello, my friend! How are you? If you're out of time or "in a rush", go to the last paragraph of this text for a fast answer.

In times of immediate responses and connection 24 hours a day, talking about long-term transformation is a risk! But… we believe you can (and must!) dream big, and make a daily effort to get better every day. This is our mission - seeing you speaking English and being a Leader wherever you go. "The 5 Essential People Skills" was written by Dale Carnegie and its goal is to improve your people skills. In other words, to improve your relationships at work and at home.

Last class we defined assertiveness as the "ability to speak and act in positive ways". Today we study two steps to be more assertive with family, friends and coworkers. "Assertiveness is also the ability to express negative emotions without personalizing the problem", says Dale Carnegie.

The first step is self-reflection. Understand yourself. Why do you accept certain attitudes? Why don't you accept certain attitudes? The author explains that as children we're bombarded with rules - don't be selfish, don't insist on being first, don't make mistakes, etc. Most of these rules are very valuable and well intentioned, but if they were downloaded into your consciousness with too much force, you may have magnified them beyond their original purpose. How often do you feel when you say "no" to people?

You have a right to be first, at least sometimes. You are allowed to makes mistakes, as long as you learn from them, my friend. The second step toward assertiveness is an honest self-assessment. Write an email or a text to three friends. List positive and negative adjectives about yourself and ask them to tell you their opinion. Which adjectives represent you?

Get to know yourself by watching your attitudes and writing down about your feelings. Ask your family and friends to describe you. Be open to receive honest feedback and make an effort to understand your strengths (easy!) and also your weaknesses (not so easy, my friend!). Start with yourself. What do you need to improve in yourself? Comment here and see you next class!